The secret about The Secret?

A negative mind will never give you a positive lifeThe other day I stumbled across the documentary ‘The Secret’ on Netflix. One of my dearest colleagues has always been telling me that this is the book for me to read and she holds a very strong faith in it so when I saw the documentary just sitting there, I figured I just give it a go. Before I never really paid attention to it as I must admit, I also believed The Secret to be just a load of non-sense, another one of those spiritual branches in the Instant-Happiness industry that’s booming right now.

After watching the documentary I have to admit: I still think it is a load of non-sense. Sorry folks.

In my own, humble and very much personal opinion, I think that the philosophy that The Secret embraces and, more specifically, the examples provided in this documentary, are too materialistic. Stuff like: “If you want that car, you have to imagine yourself driving in it”, or “If you want to have more money, start behaving like you have more money,”

Yeah that doesn’t go so well with me. Because if I know the spiritual world (and I believe that I do at least a little bit!) the last thing that it’ll do is help you get that new car or get more money. That’s just not how it works. That’s not what you should ask the universe for.

However (which is basically just a nicer word for But), I gave this philosophy some thought over the days afterwards and I have to admit that the core of The Secret, the basic principle that is in there, that is actually true. I just believe it has much more to do with psychological impact. It’s a mentality. And if you just look at the core of what The Secret is trying to tell it’s actually quite simple:

It’s all about mindset.


Think about it, imagine that you have to go to a customer visit and you are insecure about this customer. You know the value that they could have and the impact that they can have on your career. You can approach this situation in two ways:

  • You can become a victim of the situation

  • You can become a master of the situation

You can lean back, be the victim, allow yourself to be swallowed in the fact that they are so important, that they are a customer who is above your paygrade (which is basically you saying: they are above my level), you can make yourself dependent on other people present in that meeting, such as your manager and by doing so, your whole body language will change. Your voice will quiver, your handshake will be less strong, maybe you will sweat. In short: your whole body presentation will be weak. And then, trust me, when you feel weak, you will only become weaker and weaker over the course of that meeting. You are the victim. At the end of the day, customer walks away with someone else or maybe your manager had to step in and save your ass.

Or, you can decide to master the situation. When you choose to be the master, it means that you come first of all well prepared. You have a good feeling on how your customer ticks and what they want. You will not let them push you over, you will stand your ground because you actually are grounded. When you are a master of the situation, you will feel completely confident. Your presentation will be strong, your body language will say: here I am – this is my offer, I am convinced that this is the best offer that you can get and the best thing that you will need today. Your head will look up, your shoulders will be straight, your customer (and your manager) will be impressed with your results and at the end of the day you will walk out of that building with the order in your bag.

Basically, that is exactly what The Secret is saying. If you present yourself as a victim, then all you will ever be is a victim. If you present yourself as a master, then all you will ever be is a master.

See – thoughts influence emotions. Emotions influence body language. Body language is what the other person sees and judges you upon. Positive thoughts lead to positive emotions. Positive emotions lead to positive body language. Positive body language leads to success. Successes lead to more positive thoughts and there we have the circle. Now, replace positive with negative and try to understand why sometimes all the shitty things happen to you.

The line of thoughts to emotions to body language


The Secret is a guidebook for just that basic principle: change your mindset. And don’t tell yourself that you’ve changed your mindset but still keep thinking to yourself: This is not going to work, I am not good enough. Because yeah … thoughts – emotions – body language.

It’s so simple.

Ok, I am not exactly a master myself because I am currently still learning on how to be a master. So this is not really a practice what you preach kind of a situation. But everybody’s learning. And it’s good to just sit down and read these things every once in a while.

And once again. The universe does not give out cars. Or money. It’s not a car dealer. And it’s not a bank.

4 thoughts on “The secret about The Secret?

  1. Pingback: What is Happiness? (seriously) | Dimphh

  2. Pingback: The growing pains of leaving your comfort zone | Dimphh

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